Mitski - Puberty 2

Loneliness, self-hatred, depression and lost love are just a small selection of the emotional themes found on Mitski Miyawaki's latest album 'Puberty 2'. With the opening track "Happy", Mitski pleads to happiness itself "when you go, take this heart / I'll make no more use of it when there's no more you". The rapid thumping percussion of the intro is almost like a wild heartbeat, pounding away at the arrival of the long-awaited happiness. Happiness isn't there to stay, as it "comes inside" of Mitski and leaves when she isn't looking. Musically, the song builds layer upon layer, climaxing with a downright cheerful horn section which contrasts heavily with the lyrical themes. It's almost like happiness is mocking Mitski here, as she begged it to either stay or to take out her heart itself to prevent her from having to experience life devoid of happiness. Instead happiness uses her to get off and discard her when it's done, leaving her to clean up the mess. Her cynicism implies this isn't the first time. Speaking very openly, Mitski herself described this song with the simple line "happiness fucks you".

As mentioned before, depression features heavily on 'Puberty 2'. On the absolutely gorgeous track "Fireworks", Mitski claims that "one morning this sadness will fossilize, and I will forget how to cry". She's so used to the depth of her pain that she's dying inside, becoming a cold and empty shell. When she "finds the knife" of her problems "sticking out of her side", she hardly bats an eye. It's the eponymous fireworks which break the facade, a warm memory destroying her stoicism and letting the tears flow freely. "Fireworks" is beautifully composed, from the minimal acoustic guitar of the verses to the soaring synth lines of the final chorus, with Mitski's powerful voice as the perfect centerpiece.

It's been years since I've heard such a candid and deeply cutting album like this, to be honest. Mitski's lyrics are incredibly direct, painful even. There's the self-pity openly bared for the world to see. The constant feeling of not fitting in, as Mitski is a Japanese-American woman who feels neither Japanese nor American. The concept of 'Puberty 2' itself, a second puberty (this isn't a follow-up to another album called 'Puberty' if you were wondering) during adulthood, like learning to recognize your own pain and almost take comfort in it. As Mitski said of the song "Happy", "it's possible to spend periods of happiness just waiting for sadness".

The lead single on 'Puberty 2' is the song "Your Best American Girl", an incredibly powerful look at the difficulty Mitski feels trying to fit in. To her would-be lover, Mitski says "your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me / but I do, I think I do". She may not feel as though she fits in, she may not feel like an American girl, but she's proud of her Japanese heritage and it's a part of who she is. The video is equally powerful, where Mitski watches as this boy is seduced by a white girl while Mitski is left to make love to her own hand. The song is absolutely dynamic, from a very gentle and unassuming verse to an explosive, distorted monster of a chorus. It's one of the most powerful songs on the record, where for the first time here Mitski songs like she's absolutely confident, taking control of her life. And we're not even halfway through the album yet! One more thing to note is this is a very rare moment when Mitski discusses gender, which she normally avoids as she wants her music to be open to a more general populace.

On "I Bet on Losing Dogs", Mitski sings of how she, well, bets on losing dogs. She gazes into their eyes as they're defeated, and loses right along with them. Mitski actively chases relationships she knows won't work out, knowingly wasting her own time and "paying for her place by the ring", desperately reaching for any sense of feeling. She imagines this unattainable lover staring into her own eyes as she orgasms, watching her die a little bit on the inside.

The incredibly short (almost too short) "My Body's Made of Crushed Little Stars" sees Mitski in a very confessional place, saying that her body is made up of crushed little stars could have a handful of different meanings. On Twitter she has referred to the numerous tiny scars on her body as "little stars", but a very common theme in existential lyricism and poetry is how everything comes from stars, all matter that existed at the time of the big bang is still around today. There's a very modern sense of longing, "I don't know how I'm gonna pay rent, but I wanna see the whole world" is such a common sentiment these days and Mitski is putting it into the simplest terms possible. Her body is made up of literal stardust, but in her mind she's not doing anything of note. Just paying bills and existing one day at a time. This song also has the distinction of having one of the catchiest hooks of the year.

"Thursday Girl" sees Mitski afraid to face her numerous fears and emotional struggles, begging to be set free but secretly hoping that she won't be. She knows that ignoring her pain will only make it worse, and she wants to be forced to face it head-on. "A Loving Feeling" is the shortest song here, where Mitski wonders what use "love" is when the lover only loves her in private, leaving her to drown in loneliness outside of those late-night bedroom meetings.

"Crack Baby" returns to the themes explored on the opening track "Happy", where Mitski longs to be reunited with happiness. Her need for happiness is like an addiction to cocaine, as she repeats the line "crack baby, you don't know what you want, but you know that you need it / you know that you had it once". She doesn't even recognize the feeling of happiness, but she desperately craves it. The album closes with the gentle "A Burning Hill", a very light and calm acoustic piece where Mitski is ready to leave an unfulfilling relationship. Her emotions once were a lush forest, overtaken by fire to the point of destructive urgency, but now she feels dead and barren as her love has simply burned out and left her hollow inside.

'Puberty 2' is a beautiful album. It piles on harsh truths and difficult emotions blended with sheer pop perfection, these infectious melodies forcing you to sing along to the bitterness Mitski is putting on display, painstakingly putting her deepest desires forward for the world to endure. Depression twists and turns through the track list, curving through the deepest valleys of Mitski's mind and emerging through her heart. As downtrodden as it all seems, there's actually some release of pressure to be found here, some kind of solace to be found in getting it all out. It feels like Mitski is getting everything off her chest in a fulfilling display of endurance and self-gratification. With all of the sexual innuendos and lightly cynical humor, the best way to put it is probably that Mitski it literally ejaculating her feelings, just as happiness did to her in the opening track. The release of pent-up emotion is almost sexual in nature, as Mitski finds satisfaction in letting all of the feelings flow out of her in an explosion of passion.

I wasn't able to discuss every song here in depth, but I can say without a doubt that there isn't a single track on this album that I personally dislike. The lyrics are poetic and magnificent, and Mitski's absolute songwriting skill is undeniable between the aspects of melody and instrumentation and singing... To be completely honest, this album for me is almost perfect. Mitski is one of the best songwriters of this generation without a doubt, putting an incredible amount of love and care into each piece. Even what some people might consider a weak ending in "A Burning Hill" is to me a fantastic closer. Rather than making a grand statement of redemption, Mitski is letting us know that the cycle will always continue. Every emotional release begins a new buildup of fresh emotions that will in turn need to be released at their own time. Listening on repeat, the next song up is "Happy". It repeats on and on, with no hint of letting up. Happiness is callous and uncaring, so you ultimately have to make your own comfort and your own personal release. This album is Mitski's personal release.

-Justin

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